Quick Dip: What Should I Do When I Feel Disappointed?

A short read for the car journey

Category: Mindset | Read time: Under 2 minutes

Missing a qualifying time, being left out of a relay or swimming slower than you hoped can hurt. You have worked towards something and wanted it to go well.

Give yourself time to settle. Take a few gentle breaths. You can say, “I’m upset. Can we talk in a few minutes?” If you need somewhere quieter at a meet, check with your Team Manager before moving away.

Try to describe what disappointed you. “I wanted to beat my time” is more accurate than “I’m rubbish at swimming.” One result cannot tell you everything about your ability or the progress you have made.

You will not swim a PB every time. That remains true even when you train well. A slower swim does not mean your training has been wasted.

When you are ready, talk through what happened with your coach. Include what you felt and listen to what they saw. You might be disappointed with your time but have completed a turn better than before. Both can be true.

Choose one useful thing to take into training. For example, if your coach noticed you gliding into the finish, practise swimming firmly to the wall.

If another race is coming, follow your usual preparation. You do not have to feel completely cheerful before giving your next swim your attention.

If disappointment keeps affecting your enjoyment or follows you into everyday life, tell an adult you trust.

Ask a parent or carer: Can you listen first before we talk about what to do next?

Created by Basingstoke Bluefins Coaching Team